Because Business is Personal

Evolving Business Mindsets with Risa Haasbroek, the Dragon Whisperer

• Mike Caldwell and Risa Haasbroek • Season 1 • Episode 4

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Imagine if you could align your mindset to supercharge your marketing strategies, foster robust relationships, and catapult your sales? We caught up with Risa Haasbroek, renowned as the Dragon Whisperer for entrepreneurs, as she unravels the significant concept of a business mindset. Risa's inspiring journey starts in a small enchanting town in South Africa, awash with magnificent purple jacarandas. Listen to her discourse on the pivotal role of maintaining an unwavering positive outlook and relentless drive when faced with adversity, and its integral place in achieving business success.

Ever pondered the potential pitfalls of starting a business or employing family members? We delve into a client's story, revealing the dangers of co-dependency in a family-run business and how understanding this dynamic can lead to enduring benefits. In this age dominated by social media, maintaining the right mindset can be a game changer. Discover the 12 universal laws as sturdy tools to combat imposter syndrome, understand how social media can fuel feelings of inadequacy, and grasp the value of showcasing the journey and struggle, not just the polished end result.

The word 'failure', often inducing fear, is merely another stepping stone towards growth. As our conversation evolves, we discuss the importance of reframing our missteps as opportunities for growth. Learn the art of self-evaluation to streamline workload and avoid overestimating daily achievements. Nearing the end, we probe into financial decision-making. Listen to effective strategies on managing finances, even when it seems daunting, and employ the thinking-feeling-acting cycle to overcome procrastination, understand poor decision-making, and make choices that resonate with your best interests. Embark on this enriching journey that promises to reshape your outlook towards business and marketing.

The best way to connect with Risa is through LinkedIn. Here's her link: https://www.linkedin.com/in/risa-haasbroek-13b788263/

Eager to harness the power of Empathic Marketing to propel your business growth? Get your hands on my #1 Amazon Best Selling book, 'Empathic Marketing,' or book a '30-Minute Gap Analysis' session directly from my website: www.becausebusinessispersonal.com.

Discover a wealth of knowledge in our podcast archives at www.becausebusinessispersonal.com.

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Join our community and elevate your marketing game today!

Speaker 1:

Hey, welcome to the Because Business is Personal podcast, the podcast where empathy meets marketing strategy. I'm your host, Mike Caldwell, but I'm also known as the marketing medic. Now, the reason for that is because, before becoming a marketing strategist, I actually worked as a paramedic for 12 years. It was during that time that I realized how important it was to truly understand the problems your patient was facing before you started providing treatment. And it's the same understanding, the same empathy, is just as crucial when it comes to understanding our prospects and making sales, and that's why, in each episode, we'll dissect the art of empathic marketing, exploring how top professionals infuse empathy into their strategies to build stronger relationships, boost their sales and make a lasting impact. So buckle up and prepare to turn up the dial on your marketing effectiveness. As we gear up to dive deeper into the realm of empathic marketing, I'd like to share a couple of special offers with you. First, you can get a free copy of my international bestselling book Empathic Marketing. You only need to cover the cost of shipping. Reading this will provide you with a much more in-depth understanding of the empathy-based marketing approach that we explore in this show. Next, I'm offering a 50% discount on a transformative 30-minute gap analysis session with me. During the session, we'll identify the hurdles in your marketing efforts and together we'll develop an actionable roadmap aimed at winning you more clients and making you more sales. Just visit my website, wwwBecauseBusinessIsPersonalcom to grab your book or use coupon code podcast to take advantage of my gap analysis offer. So why wait? Let's start turbocharging your marketing strategy today. Now let's get started with our episode.

Speaker 1:

All right, Hello everyone. We've got a special show today. Riza Asbrook did I say that? Right, Riza? That's it, Asbrook. Well, she is the dragon whisperer for entrepreneurs. She helps them to tame, train and then fly their inner dragons. You can also think of Riza as a mindset coach for business owners. So welcome Riza. You're the first dragon whisperer I've had on the show.

Speaker 2:

I'm glad I'm so unique. Thank you, Brad.

Speaker 1:

Now I think we all want to know what a dragon whisper is. But before we start with that, I like to. My whole podcast is about business, is personal, and my book is about empathic marketing, as that's human connection. So before we dive into the business side of our chat, what's something non-business related about you that our listeners may find interesting or quirky?

Speaker 2:

I come from the same small city in South Africa that Elan Muscat.

Speaker 1:

Really yes.

Speaker 2:

Were you neighbors. No, I was not saying that he's much younger than me and he's been in the US for much longer than me. But yes, it's the city's name, it's the capital, it's all here.

Speaker 1:

Okay, is that where you still are, or have you no, no?

Speaker 2:

I'm in the US now, but that's where I was born and raised.

Speaker 1:

Oh, very cool. What's interesting or unique about that town?

Speaker 2:

Oh, its nickname is Anjaca Rando City. So it's like it's this purple. It's actually the tree soft from Brazil, but they're also. They're strutting so well in Pretoria, so every string, but that could be around October. These jacarabas, they just go into bloom and they are purple and they're laying the streets and it's quite a sight, it's beautiful.

Speaker 1:

Oh, wow, sounds beautiful. Do you ever get back there?

Speaker 2:

Yes, we go back to our home. I'm coming in, give a sauce and visit the town. Good, yes.

Speaker 1:

All right. Well, let's dive into the business side of it. So my first question has to be what makes you a dragon whisperer, and what is this dragon you refer to, as I'm pretty confident it's not a literal dragon.

Speaker 2:

I hope not. Okay, so I have this great quote. I think it's Winston Churchill who said the way to be successful is to fail and fail again, without ever losing enthusiasm. And that is what it's about. It's about the emotion. It's how do you process negative emotions that's inevitably part of being a business owner and how do you generate positive emotions intentionally on the month to keep that enthusiasm that old Churchill was talking about. That's it in a nutshell. That's what I help people with.

Speaker 1:

Okay, because I quite often guest on podcasts myself and I live off the grid and a lot of hosts asked like how is living off the grid prepared you for being a marketer? And my answer to that is like I've lived off the grid for 20 years, and so when I first started doing it, nobody out there had done it before. And so when I went to you know like a well pump place, like I needed to get well pumped, but I didn't have enough power to run a regular well pump. I'm like how can I do this? And the answer was like oh well, if you don't have this many watts and this many volts and amps and you can't do it, it's like that can't be the truth. No, I would go to store after store after store.

Speaker 1:

They all tell me the same thing, and so this is those negative things that you're talking about, right, and you could just say well, they said it can't be done. I guess it can't be done, but if I stayed positive, it can move forward. You know what We've got? A well pump now works great. Like we found the solution, but we just had to ask like 17 people before the 18th person said and so this was the answer. The 18th person said why don't you just use a soft start well pump, because we had the power to run the pump. But you know anything about electricity and the pipes.

Speaker 2:

No, it has for said engineer is a new peer engineer, so I know a lot about, I know, yeah, and I should know that's right.

Speaker 1:

And so you know, like, when you run your vacuum cleaner, as soon as you try, the vacuum cleaner on the lights did a little bit right, because there's that energy hammer and that's what my system couldn't handle. It could handle the well pump running, but it couldn't handle that initial spike, though it's like three times the amount of energy that it uses on when it's just generally running. And so this kisic why don't you just use a soft start pump that doesn't have that spike? It was just so matter of fact to him. It's a thing and he's like, and he knew about it and he's just like why don't you just do that, like I was like a moron or something I'm like because I'm at?

Speaker 2:

17 people. But that's right. That's the final and final game. And was it anything? Who said he just like, found a hundredth of ways how not to make a lightbulb? No, that's exactly what you did, but you have very good sermon to do that if you kicked Austin.

Speaker 1:

Well, I don't know if this falls into your work, but I didn't have a choice. Like my wife wanted to wash her hair, like I had to make it happen. I think maybe with some entrepreneurs, that's part of the problem is, a lot of entrepreneurs start out with a full time job and they're doing this on the side, and so if they fail at their entrepreneur endeavor, it's not the end of the world. They just keep working. Right, it is what it is, but I didn't have that option. Well, you jumped.

Speaker 2:

I think a lot of us just bow feet into it and you're no idea how deep the water was. Okay.

Speaker 1:

Exactly Right. So thank you. What motivates you to start down this path? And here we go. This is the perfect question for you, particularly what motivated you to start down this path, and have you had any regrets since making that decision?

Speaker 2:

Okay. So we came to the US eight years ago. My husband got a job here and we had two teenage children at the time. I homeschooled them. Then we moved to the US like they were 15 and 17 difficult times to move, but that's not the story. But because of the exchange rate between the two countries, and at the moment it's about one to 20. So 20 South African lands $1.

Speaker 2:

So had realized that we would not be able to retire here. I was afraid of that At the beginning. I was so. You know. Everything was so expensive in the US because I was still thinking in South Africa currency. Right. I told my husband I'm not going to go back to Africa and my children are staying here, because I could see them making a living here.

Speaker 2:

And I decided I'm starting a business and you often start. You often as entrepreneurs, you do that. You start with what you know. So I did this online course for other homeschoolers in South Africa. I sold it to them, but I had no idea what I was doing. I was working so hard because it was so dumb I've no idea how to upload, how to make a website, how to upload the course material to the quack full and people were dragging emails and I would respond to each one of them personally, until I realized that I was immediately just starting a question over and over again. I could just make one blog post and refer to it, to the blog post, and you'll think like that you have to, like you did, jump in with both feet and then discover what you don't know and speak it out.

Speaker 2:

So at some point I was ready to give up because I was making money. But when I think of the hours I work, then one day I listened to a podcast which I had left coach and she was working three days a week and making millions of dollars and it dawned on me I'm not doing this right, there's a better way to do this. Okay. And then I started following her and applying some of the mindset stuff that she was like telling and I could see working less and less and even making more and more money eventually. But then by then I started in love with the mindset part of it and I was. This is what I've always wanted to do. So I used that little first business to pay for the coach certification. We got certified through this woman's coach school and here I am now I'm a coach for business animals and business coaches.

Speaker 1:

That is a very cool story.

Speaker 2:

No, at the beginning, when you struggle, when you can't keep up the enthusiasm, I was like, what did I do? I don't. But now that I've got more of the hang of it, this is the way I want to look being paid to do what I do, I got privileged. It's amazing. So no regrets.

Speaker 1:

No, I can see you definitely have a passion for it. I think that's a big part of it, right? Yes, so can you share an interesting story about a major challenge you, or maybe one of your clients, faced in business, and how taming the dragon overcame it Okay?

Speaker 2:

Let me think about. Yes, this is one woman that I coach for Russell Bruniston, you know of kick funnels. Yeah, I was on a contract. I wasn't wanting to play role but contracted acid with Mentum Coach in Newstermostomite. Okay, there was a woman there that I coach and she was Employing her brother in her business because she was. But she told me we have to be there for our family. Now I know the patterns of codependency. Ask me how I know. First off, she did it, so I was like what's going on here? And then I told her it's not working, he's missing out and he's her brother so she can't really control him. Well, and there's a history of him not performing. And I shared my little sermon about the four countries that you can live in, emotionally speaking, that I gave there and I hope your listeners will sign. Interesting as well.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I'm waiting for four countries. What are these?

Speaker 2:

Okay, you can live in a country where you do things that are bad for other people but good for you. So that's the land of criminals and psychopaths and sociopaths. Okay, you just you don't want to live there because crime doesn't work out. Which is the country where you do things that are bad for you and bad for others? Now, that's the country of this functionality, and I think that's where my client was. It's like she was. It was not really helping her brother to enable him in this way and it was definitely not helping her. So, lack of boundaries. He talked, pleasing codependency. And then there's a country where you do things that are bad for you but good for other people, so you're sacrificing your life for others. That's the country.

Speaker 1:

I live in.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's true, just like being aware of that. That's it. Oh, statistically, if you undercharge in your business all the time, it's really not sustainable. And then there's what I call the Republic of Wisdom, where you are, the things that are good for you, a lot of which would you well as good for other people? Okay, but as an immigrant, I can tell you you need a sure visa for that country, and that stamp is must have the ability to tolerate short-term discomfort for a long-term goal.

Speaker 2:

So it's like having the short-term uncomfortable feelings with back to the feelings, the dragon again, the inner dragon, dealing with that and thinking of the long-term game. So, returning to my client, in the long run it was better for her brother to get booted out of a business so that he could get his act together. It was really not serving him in the long run and it was literally not serving her. So, but did he like it when she fired him? No, the old, obviously he didn't like that. So I had a coach who threw that. And that's the abilities that short-term you get a few bad for a minute. It's almost like when your kid has tantrum in the stool and people are staring at. What about parents? You are and you're not giving in to give the candy because you know it's not good for them in the long run. It's that kind of one, okay, huh, I.

Speaker 1:

so the candy and the tantrum brings me to a story where I used to do corporate team building training at our place here and we had a group of social workers here Like it was 34 female social workers and we just had the most amazing day.

Speaker 1:

Like everybody loved the day, or I loved me, they thought I was amazing and I had two female border colleagues who one was older, one was a puppy and they used to fight for dominant and I understand dog nature or whatever, and I just let them fight, because they would fight a little bit, one would win and then that would be it, and so that's that's what I did, like that's that's how you, that's what you do with with dog.

Speaker 1:

Anyway, that's what I did. But they fought in front of all these women and what happened is what always happens one dog sort of won, but then the loser dog kind of looked up and saw that 34 people just saw her lose. It's like, oh no, like this isn't going to fly, and so she started the fight again and that it was odd, like it wasn't their normal fight, that they normally like this was a serious battle, and one dog got bit in the air and there was some blood. And now I've got these 34 female social workers like thinking I'm Michael Vick and all I do is like have dog fights at my house and it went from. Yeah, it went bad.

Speaker 2:

So you know exactly what I'm talking about. Just get back into the country of wisdom. You know that's the way you deal with your dogs and you know that because you know being well trust, that's right, that's right.

Speaker 1:

But non dog owners, you know they don't understand All right. So how do you incorporate empathy into your marketing strategies, or do you, you know, encourage your clients to incorporate into their marketing strategies, and can you give any examples of how that made a significant impact?

Speaker 2:

Okay. So the basic framework that I use is there's a thinking, feeling, acting cycle always going on in your mind. You're thinking, feeling, acting, okay. Then it creates an emotion for you and that drives you to act, and something like empathy, or, as I would call it, compassion, is that's the one in the middle of the ceiling, is a beautiful feeling. To act strong, okay, to let that drive your emotion and that makes a distinction between compassion and pity. For instance, for me, if you pity other people, it's condescending. You are here and they are there, okay. But passion, that's just the dragon whisperer's definition of compassion. Yeah. Empathy, as you would call it, is I'm a human, I'm a mess up. You're a human, you mess up.

Speaker 1:

Right.

Speaker 2:

And we can meet each other as equals, as infallible humans who are not interested and I get that about myself, so it's not about self-acceptance and when you accept yourself, you can accept other people as well and forgive and allow them to mess up, and that's that. That, I think, is like one of the basic things around empathy that I use a lot in my coaching.

Speaker 1:

Okay, that's yeah, that's sort of yeah. I think that's the biggest part is that we all know this right, we don't know the journey that the other person is on, like we don't know how many bad things happened to them that morning before you know. You just inadvertently, like upped them on the shoulder and they have a melt. You're like you know what's wrong with that person and they say you don't know the path that they walk, either that day or even in their life. Right, I've got a client right now and she's a. She uses the 12 universal laws that you should really, with the 12 universal laws, sometimes there's you might mail that. What's that? Yeah, for a month we have that one.

Speaker 2:

What's that Well?

Speaker 1:

so you know the law of attraction right.

Speaker 2:

It's this faint bell ringing somewhere you have to leverage. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Well, everybody knows the law of attraction, the secret right, and so that's one of the universal laws. There's a lot of vibration, a lot of gender. There's 12, 12 different laws. But anyway she was a super successful business woman on the outside, Like she had a nice car, she had a nice house, she had the nice clothes right. But on the inside she kind of felt like she was imposter because she was a mess, like her credit cards were maxed out, like her family thought stuff was falling apart.

Speaker 1:

But everybody saw her as this super successful woman and she didn't feel that way on the inside. And she she said you know what? I need a time to take a break from this. And so she liked riding motorcycles, like she really liked riding motorcycles. So she booked a trip that started in Europe and took her all through Italy and Russia, and like it was a trip around the world pretty much. And during those 12, during that time she implemented those 12 universal laws. And it's just interesting because that's an example of somebody who's seen in one perspective but stealing completely differently. And now what she did and she kind of nurtured this during her trip was these 12 universal laws and the Hot Pot-A-Pono spirituality from Hawaii, and now she's using all of that to help other women because there's so many. I'm sure there's men in that situation too, but she, just she focuses on women to help with that imposter syndrome.

Speaker 2:

Yes, but that's. It's more universal. When we think you know and I think social media is to blame you all work out as a people like they're fully curated for feeds and their lives. Nothing is ever out of, there's not a hair out of it. And then you compare that to your inner life that's missing and think that what's wrong with me? I'm the only one feeling like that and that's not true. Just realizing that is so liberating.

Speaker 1:

It is, and I actually am conscious of that now. I did a Facebook Reel last week in fact, because I live off the grid, we have 160 acres and I do a lot of woodworking and I always post like these beautiful pieces that I make and I say, oh, that's so beautiful. But I have a sawmill and I show people like you're using the sawmill and that looks really cool, but I hauling a tree out of the woods last week. We've had so much rain here this year. The trails are all my what's that. We are near Ottawa, canada, in the western Quebec, yeah, so it's just a really wet summer and so the trails are all wet, the mosquitoes are crazy.

Speaker 1:

So, anyway, I went back to to drag a tree out and like within two minutes I got my ATV, got stuck in the mud and I had I had to like put my winch on a tree and there's. So I did a Facebook live showing how stuck my ATV was and how, like, my face is being swarmed by mosquitoes. And then it started raining and it was just miserable and I'm like I could just show you like the really cool cupboard I make out of this tree, like, oh look, but I don't show you like the effort, the work and the pain and the suffering that that went into it, right Cause no people just want to show the happy. You know, the 30 second snippet of a good life. For the rest of the 20 other three hours of the day are met.

Speaker 2:

And then we think that's the way life should be, and anybody else has it like that. What's wrong with me and that's right and this is?

Speaker 1:

I think one of the biggest reason empathy is so important today is again what you said about social media like we've lost this human connection. Like empathy is about authenticity and honesty and that you know, showing that 30 second photo of you at the beach is it's real, but it's like say it's just a snippet of the bigger picture You're not seeing like the kid covered in. You know VCs They've got to hear. You know your car is being stolen. You don't see it. Many times, as entrepreneurs, we will try things that don't end up being successful. So how do we take those times and use them to propel us forward instead of allowing them to stop our progress?

Speaker 2:

Okay, you are going to find a lot. We've talked about that already. So I would always tell people to evaluate. So don't just do things. You have to sometimes ask yourself you know, think about what it is that I'm doing and is it working?

Speaker 2:

And when you evaluate, you always want to start with a long list of what is working, because human brains we tend to default to the negative, and it has to do with your survival. You have to pay more attention to negative things than positive things. I'm from South Africa, so let me give you an example. So if you walk out on your porch and there's a deadly snake and there's a friendly neighbor, you should pay more attention to the snake if you want to live another day. And that happens again and again and again in your life. But you have a different cortex as well, so you can turn yourself. That theory is just a rubber snake and the neighbor is we need neighbors, we need friendly neighbors, so we are going to pay attention to that.

Speaker 2:

So to overcome that negativity, by it you're making a long list of things that are working. Now that you've calmed down your brain, now you ask yourself what hasn't worked, what's not working, and then that should be a much shorter list. And then the most important question what are they doing different? So that's, I would say in a nutshell, that's how I would approach things that are not working. You still want to extract the gold out of any experience, and it could be a skill that you learn, that you don't even realize it's not directly relatable, but you can still apply it in a new situation. You want to remind yourself that you are always growing, so there's always some, like I said, gold that you can extract from any experience. So telling yourself that is a great idea.

Speaker 1:

Okay Is. Do you like to create lists or anything? Oh yes, Something that you can visualize better.

Speaker 2:

I would like I would make a list. Yes, I would just type it out. It's actually better to write it out, but I have a horrible handwriting, so I would try the type, but at least I could read it back.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I actually, and I usually remember like the gist of things. I don't remember the specifics, but I just saw something about the writing, the handwriting, because that is a creative action and that's your right brain, I guess, and that ties into the left brain, the logical side. So by writing it out as opposed to typing it out, you get a better union of your left and right brain.

Speaker 2:

Yes, so it's like I think with in the education space they are. Children need to write. We can't just let them type all the time. They need to write, and I think it's exactly for the reason that you are saying it. Something magical happens between the pen and the paper. It's a different kind of experience and type.

Speaker 1:

That's right yeah.

Speaker 2:

I'm a big type. I don't like writing because my handwriting is so bad. I would much rather prefer this, but I get the value. So I try to remind myself of things that I need to write.

Speaker 1:

I think most of us type more so than write, but I know what I'm going to. So we live in the woods in the middle of nowhere, so when I go to town I can't forget anything, because that's the thing, right, Go out into town, yeah, if you ever get something, it's 40 minutes each way to go and get it again. It's not like you know. Just hop over the storm and I've got a smart phone, like everybody does, and it's got shopping lists. But I don't. I never use my phone. I always have a pen and paper list, and because I think I also get, the satisfaction is when I'm in the store I cross stuff off, and this might be part of what you're talking about too.

Speaker 1:

And this is why I was thinking about the writing thing, because I don't. Quite often I'll have a goal for the day that I want to do, and quite often I don't. I don't plead that goal and so the day is a failure, right? No, no, yeah, so I gotta leave this open. So why isn't it a failure if I don't complete my goal?

Speaker 2:

This evaluation thing that I was talking about. That's something I would do once a week sexual incidents, and definitely like once somewhere, like once a quarter, and then every time zoom out so that you can see the dots, the impressionist painting, and see the picture that your life is making. So I would plead every day, but you know also it's time consuming. But telling yourself today was a failure because I didn't. Okay, my first question as a coach is why is the list so long that you do not get to everything? Are you? Why are you overestimating what you can do? That's like I would just ask the question not to jug. Okay. So, and we all do that, I think we all overestimate what we can do in a day. And this is gonna be easier than you forget if you're opening the computer, finding it. It's like you just sit down and start typing, if you could, but at least like prep work to do or what.

Speaker 1:

That's right. That's right, and I think this is why I sort of mentioned the list is quite often I have a goal for the day, that I'm gonna finish this blog post or whatever, and that's what I'm gonna do, but at the end of the day it's not done, because I didn't see all the other stuff on my list. I wasn't conscious, like. One of the things I did today was we went our mortars is up for renewal, so we met with the bank yesterday, went to the bank and they said, oh, their computer was dead. Oh, of course. So they had to. So we went through all the stuff but we couldn't sign the papers. So he sent us an email today with doc design. But I did that today, like, actually they sent it yesterday and I put it up, so it was two days ago. We went to the bank, he sent it yesterday. I'm like, oh, I'm too busy to do that, right, and then I did it today. But it sounds like I should sort of celebrate that win. I had a win.

Speaker 2:

You want your mortgage to be timely and everything is sorted out. Just remind yourself, it's like, if you use human as a verb, we still need to human.

Speaker 1:

Oh, that's interesting okay.

Speaker 2:

It's these things we need to do in our lives, even if we are business owners, and that'll be a gain of your financial stuff is kind of him.

Speaker 1:

It is yeah, that'd be fully transparent. He's a great loan specialist and he called me like six weeks or weeks ago and he's like, hey, mike, your mortgage is coming up for a dual in four or six weeks. But what we can do now is we can just lock in today's rate because the basic goes up, you don't have to pay more. And I went online, I did a little. I'm like yeah, interest rates are gonna go anywhere. So we went to the bank on the 24th of July. On the 21st the rates went up a quarter percent and it's the way it works. But it's whatever $1,000 a year.

Speaker 2:

On big balance it can make a big difference.

Speaker 1:

I didn't need to take that hit. It's just because I procrastinated and I don't like dealing with money stuff. So I was like, yeah, so how would? So that's one of my weaknesses is, I don't like to talk about money, I don't like to deal with money, I don't like to think about money. So that's what that was one of my. So, as a dragon whisperer, like, how would you help me avoid next time my mortgage comes around losing a quarter percent?

Speaker 2:

My interest. Okay. So if you think of the thinking, feeling, acting cycle, what do you need to tell yourself and what's the feeling you want to create so that you do it? So you really start in your own brain. So it's $1,000 that you well, we're just saying a number right that you could have used elsewhere. So something empowering, like I'm taking good care of my money. And then you feel more empowered when, then, you just do the thing, Because when you were stuck in the mud there was no way that we're not going to do that.

Speaker 1:

You just oh no, I had to do it. I could do it. I think our mortgage is renewed in two or three days. We had to do it this week. There was no option, or I could have done it six weeks ago. He said we'll lock it at whatever percent, but if it goes down, don't worry, we're not locking it at a higher rate, if it goes down you'll. So there was no loose situation for me, but I just didn't want to deal with it at that moment.

Speaker 2:

That uncomfortable feelings for a minute, it's going to not feel nice to do it. So what do you need to tell yourself? What's the thought that would drive a better feeling, so that you act in a way that you know is in your best interest?

Speaker 1:

Okay.

Speaker 2:

That's why I take good care of my money, or I can do this, and if I do this, it's going to make my life so much easier. Whatever it is, and it's no use coming from my brain. It was told from your brain. Then you believe it.

Speaker 1:

Okay, is there a way for me to recognize that I'm making a bad decision and I need to change my? I think that's a big thing. Like when I was making that bad decision, I wasn't saying, oh, this is a bad decision, I should change my thinking about this. Like how do you have that awakening to the fact that you are making a bad decision right now?

Speaker 2:

When your behavior would be a very good clue. It's like if you procrastinate and you find yourself putting things off. It would be nice if you can catch yourself what's going on and just like, get curious about what's going on in your own motivation. Why am I avoiding this? What am I feeling? What is it? How does it make you feel? And what about thinking that's creating that feeling, and do I want to keep that feeling? The concept is not serving me so often.

Speaker 2:

The actions, the behavior is a good kind of like. It leaves like the footprints, like, okay, what do you? It leaves clues. What are you Right? And the other thing would be the feeling. If you're not feeling the example I'm always using if you are visiting your mother-in-law, you come home and they just finish the top of ice cream and it's probably a good time to ask yourself why am I doing this? That's once again the feeling, that's the one. Oh, it's not a good example, it's another action. But if you're feeling, you get up in the morning, you're feeling depressed and you're feeling so like I don't want to do whatever I want to do today. So that's a feeling. Then why am I feeling this way? Is because of something I'm telling myself Okay.

Speaker 2:

I can change that. That's the big power if you realize that we can change the way, we can change our thoughts, and then everything else change.

Speaker 1:

Okay, because I think it wasn't a constant annoyance with me, but it was always in the back of my mind that I have to meet with them. I have to meet with them, I have. I shouldn't have just met with them, and it would have been so much better for somebody.

Speaker 2:

But okay, now it's like extract the gold from that situation so that you can do it again.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, oh, very cool. So I thank you pretty much. In the last five or 10 minutes answered my final question, but maybe you could just be really concise with this. So can you share one actionable strategy or tip from your expertise that our listeners can implement today to start seeing results?

Speaker 2:

Okay, I would encourage them to use one of my favorite strategies the Acrylic Triangle of Triumph. So what you need to do is think of it's a triangle, be characteristic you like about yourself. For instance, you're brave, you're a problem solver, you're persistent, you're determined whatever it is something you like about yourself. But then you need to tell yourself a specific story. At a time when you display that because our brains are, it really lights up when you tell it a story and it carries a different, more potent emotional load. So remind yourself of that time. For instance, you were willing to just go off the grid and just do it.

Speaker 2:

Of course I'm courageous and remind yourself of the obstacles you had to overcome, like you told me at the beginning, all those many times you had to ask how can I overcome this spike problem? So I am persistent, I am courageous, whatever the characteristic is. And then when you're feeling like an ambassador, like I'm a saint, I'm courageous because of that time. So it's bold yourself to triangle. Find three of them. It's like a little a rail that you can hang onto. This is to me.

Speaker 1:

Wow, that's super helpful, Thank you. So if people wanted to learn more about what you do or get some more help from you, how would they reach out to you? How would they contact you?

Speaker 2:

If they can follow me on LinkedIn. I'm very active on LinkedIn, share lots of these things we talked about on LinkedIn as well, and the best way to just like to see if I would be a good fit for them as a coach would be to make a complimentary discovery call with me, and then they can get a feel of how it feels to work with me and, if they want to, I am a sec coach. I think that's the best way to get into my work.

Speaker 1:

Okay, perfect, and I'll put the links to your LinkedIn and to your website and everything in the in the in the podcast notes. Well, thank you so much, riza. This is again the first dragon whisperer. I might be the last.

Speaker 2:

I hope you. I want to be the only jack of the fit Scooter either with the If I could find another one.

Speaker 1:

I want her on the show, though, because this is so much fun. It was so insightful and helpful. Yeah, I hope our listeners get some good value out of it as well.

Speaker 2:

Thank you so much for having me. This was Bob All right?

Speaker 1:

Well, stay in touch with it, riza. Thanks again for coming Bye, and that is a wrap for this episode of Because Business is Personal. Thanks for joining us and don't forget to take advantage of my two special offers. First, you can get a free copy of my bestselling book Empathic Marketing. You just pay for the shipping. Or you get a 50% discount on my gap analysis session with the Kuban code podcast. Head over to wwwBecauseBusinessIsPersonalcom or check the show notes for details. If you've enjoyed today's episode, please don't forget to follow, subscribe, leave a review and share the podcast with others who might benefit. Your support means the world to us, so stay tuned for our next episode, where we'll continue to delve into the intersection of empathy and marketing strategy. Remember, because Business is Indeed Personal, every connection counts. Until next time, see you then.